“Success is not always easy,” says Soulaima Gourani. “Most of us say we want success, but when we actually think about success it can have major consequences. It can bring you many social challenges - one of them is the level of jealousy...even from friends and family!””
Many successful entrepreneurs have said that the more success they achieve, the fewer friends they feel they have. It’s not only an African phenomenon - it’s a global issue. The question is whether is stops or motivates you! Human beings have fundamental difficulties with handling success—in particular, the success of others. We accept that strangers are successful, but we just don’t like to see our brother, old friend, our ex, or former classmate, succeed.
Some even say we’ve evolved to experience emotions like jealousy and envy as a natural response to our perceived “social rank” in society! When people close to us succeed in their endeavours, we as humans require a “logical” explanation why we were not the successful ones.
The foundation of friendship is that you are each other’s equal and that balance is shifted when one party is successful while the other is not. Success among our closest friends is often more problematic.
Success comes in many forms. It might be having a new cool job, losing a lot of weight, or finding a new boyfriend/girlfriend (while you might still be single after
searching for a partner for a long time).
Jealousy is more frequently seen between two friends than between two people who don’t know each other. When someone with the same background as yourself (for example, an old classmate) is successful, you will often feel unhappy about it than if the person in question was a stranger.
The worst thing is if an old classmate who wasn’t even smarter than you becomes successful. This situation is almost more than we can handle.
As long as you are generally happy on your friend’s behalf, feeling a little bit jealous is okay. Your reaction just shows that you would like to achieve something similar. It can motivate you to reach the same achievement as your friend.
